Get together with loved ones for a International Happiness Day celebration! (^.^)

It is quality rather than quantity that matters. – Seneca

I am a firm believer and practitioner in quality time, especially concerning the things and people that matter most to me.  I am going for quality time with a few of my favourite people today.  What about you?  Unleash your creativity, permit yourself to be Happy, Happier, Happiest!  Not just for today, but for many many many days to come!

For those following the VIA strengths alignment, this action is in line with Loving and Allowing Oneself to Be Loved.

A Happy you, a Happy life, a Happy work, a Happy family, all this can be yours only if you choose to.

A very Happy International Happiness Day to you!!!

Shanshine smiles and cari saluti!
Shan
Your International Happiness Day Ambassador (Singapore)

How did yesterday’s actions go for me?

I am very pleased that my once conscious incompetent actions have evolved into unconscious competent actions!

I was so thrilled and enlightened that I wrote Focus on the positive: It works! A real life story immediately after I had the revelation!  I still remember Napoleon Hill’s words in Think and Grow Rich, along the lines of we cannot afford the luxury of a single negative thought.  I would like to add,

We have the luxury of infinite positive thoughts! – Yip Pei Shan

Notice the optimistic thinking in action!  Did it take a lot of time and effort to do so?  No.  Initially, it took a lot of time and effort.  With continuous usage and a laser beam focus, it became a habit.  Once it becomes a habit, it’s ingrained into your system.  Need support with this?  Contact me.

Be a Shanshine Smiler!  Give everyone you meet a Shanshine smile.  Share your smiles by uploading your Shanshine smiling photo on Facebook and tag me! (^.^)

A smile is a heart-to-heart communication: it emanates from your heart, radiates on your face, and lights up the hearts of others – Yip Pei Shan

Have you ever noticed how people who smile and laugh a lot are so attractive?  A smile is a terrific icebreaker, and it does not take much effort to do so!  Smiling possibly enhances our strengths in Social Intelligence/Personal Intelligence/Emotional Intelligence; Kindness and Generosity; Loving and Allowing Oneself to Be Loved; and Playfulness and Humour.

Smile!  Are you shining yet?

How did yesterday’s actions go for me?

I had a whale of a time laughing with a video of  my friend’s standup comedy performance!  A good friend encountered a nasty client yesterday, so we shared some laughs over Russell Peter and a funny joke!  Go for the funnies!

Tell someone special “I love you!” (^.^)

These three little words exemplify your courage, sincerity and commitment to yourself, your character, your life and the people that you say this to.

These are in line with capitalising on strengths such as social/personal/emotional intelligence (how you express it is an art and science in itself); bravery (it takes courage!); genuineness (by being true to yourself and the one you express to); and loving and allowing oneself to be loved.

It can be anyone that you love – your family, your husband, your wife, your children, your friends, your partner, etc.  Give it a go!

How did yesterday’s actions go for me?

I did not get the number of an attractive stranger because the most attractive (not to say the best) are my friends already!!!  Nevertheless, I shared the meaning and value with my friends.  It was wonderful seeing stunned and passionate reactions when I shared!  I encourage you to use these actions as often as you wish.  It is not for one day, but for many more days in your life to act upon.

Start Having Action Now, Start Having Infinite New 3nergy!

To my loved ones, I love you!

Do you have zest for life?  Zest is the last of the 24 strengths in the VIA, and is categorised under Transcendence.  Vigorous and enthusiastic enjoyment encapsulates zest (Zest, n.d.)!

September 13th is my first performance on the big stage in a grand theatre.  Having been to Victoria Concert Hall several times as a spectator, it is a dream come true not only to intimately experience the performance area, but also to experience first hand a live performance on stage, with a 500-strong audience!

Awesome is the word, zest is my feeling!  Have you experienced totality in your encounters and activities?  Do you experience the passionate drive that fires up your engine for the entire 24 hours?

Looking at the positive aspect of things does wonders.  I conducted an experiment on searching for positives, and I’m getting addicted to it!  Cars vacate their parking lots when we arrive in the carpark, seats become instantly available when we arrive at a restaurant, great offers abound with each corner turned in shopping malls, and countless other positives occur when I take the effort to search for it!

Furthermore, testament to my search for positives, my singing group and me have the honourable privilege to perform in the Shanghai Arts Festival in China!  Better still, we will be performing together with the best Chinese singers as well!  This privilege is very much coveted by many Singaporean singing groups, which makes it even more precious.

Having a zest for your life, and to build in a natural search for positives, colours your life into a rainbow of spirit, passion and drive.  By your very own zest, you become an inspiration for others to follow in your footsteps.

Have a zest for life, because

Living

Is

Fantastically

Excellent!

References

Zest. (n.d.). WordNet® 3.0. Retrieved September 10, 2008, from Dictionary.com website: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/zest

Yes, and if so, even more important in today’s context.

What is authenticity? Authenticity, one of the VIA‘s strengths, is defined as “owning one’s personal experiences, be they thoughts, emotions, needs, preferences, or beliefs, processes captured by the injunction to know oneself” and “behaving in accordance with the true self” (Harter, 2002, p. 382). In essence, authenticity is being real and true to yourself.

Definitely, authenticity is vital in the extrapersonal (dealing with groups of individuals), interpersonal (dealing on a one-on-one basis) and intrapersonal (dealing with yourself) domains. However, the crux of the issue lies not in being authentic, but in daring to be authentic.

Wanting to be authentic is one thing, however, having the courage to be authentic is another. Sometimes in our interactions with people, we may display a certain measure of inauthenticity. For example, when we are thrown into an unfamiliar situation where we need to collaborate with strangers, we may display our best behaviour or perhaps inhibit our personality. Reasons for doing so may be attributed to our extroversion-introversion levels and our defence mechanisms (examples such as negative feelings caused by being judged by others, our insecurities and our confidence levels).

My point is, do not let your negativities restrict your authentic self. Instead, let your authenticity shine. By being authentic, greater self-esteem, better psychological well-being, increased feelings of friendliness and heightened performance may be experienced (Grandey, Fiske, Mattila, Jansen, & Sideman, 2005). This translates into holistic happiness and radiant health. In other words, this suggests greater efficiency and effectiveness at work, deeper satisfaction and involvement in relationships, as well as a keener and developed self-awareness.

How can we be authentic? A powerful blueprint could be Bill George’s (2003) concept called Authentic leadership with three main points:

1. Self-awareness

Understand ourselves especially our strengths and weaknesses. Understand also the sparkles within us that encapsulate our self. Moreover, gain insights into ourselves and become aware of our influence on others. This may be achieved through people interactions and psychological interventions.

2. Develop and practice your values

Determine, enhance and enforce your values in all situations. Our values are visible in the actions we perform, and staying true to our values inspires trust, building on our authenticity.

3. Lead with your heart

Be open and share of yourself with others fully. Also, inculcate and show a genuine interest in others. Inspire others with your empathy, compassion, passion and courage. And always listen, listen and listen.

Are you ready to be authentic?

References

George, B. (2003). Authentic leadership: Rediscovering the secrets to creating lasting value. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.

Grandey, A. A., Fiske, G. M., Mattila, A. S., Jansen, K .J., & Sideman, L. A. 2005. Is “service with a smile” enough? Authenticity of positive displays during service encounters. Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes, 96: 38-55.

Harter, S. 2002. Authenticity. In C. R. Snyder & S. J. Lopez (Eds.), Handbook of positive psychology: 382-394. London: Oxford University Press.

I believe there is an abundance of knowledge and power, and ever increasing goodness as well. The crux lies in using our signature strengths, and in particular, how well we use our signature strengths. The flow diagram below details the stages of signature strengths.

1. Self-awareness of signature strengths concept

2. Identification of signature strengths

3. Application of signature strengths

4. Mastery of signature strengths

As seen in the flow diagram above, we can contribute to knowledge, power and goodness at any stage.  The only difference is that with using and mastering our signature strengths, compared with just being aware of and knowing our signature strengths, we can lead increasingly meaningful lives with the least effort expended and most happiness guaranteed.

What is the meaningful life in aid of?  The mindless augmenting and pursuit of knowledge?  The bottomless thirst for power?  The pious search and protests for goodness?

In these times of excess, the awareness for excellence is greater.  What is excellence?  Excellence is quality.  Quality knowledge and quality power.  This leads to another question.  What is quality?  Quality is governed by choice and goodness.  We have the choice to choose our knowledge and our power, and this choice is influenced by our definition of goodness.

In summary, a meaningful life contributes to the proliferation of knowledge, power and goodness.  A need for excellence, in terms of quality, is required to select the appropriate knowledge and power to lead a meaningful life spearheaded by what we call goodness.

References

Seligman, M. E. P. (2002). Authentic Happiness: Using the New Positive Psychology to Realise Your Potential for Lasting Fulfillment. New York: Simon & Schuster.

A few weeks back, I remembered having a burning curiosity about the timing gadget used in a meeting.  I got so engaged in finding out about this marvellous gadget, how the buttons worked, what made up the lights; I started leaning forward and nearly fell off my chair while doing it.  Sylvester, the gadget operator, was eyeing me in silent mirth.

At this point in time, I am experimenting writing this in a public setting.  Distractions of all natures arouses my curiosity.  What I am doing is to have a change in environment, to ignite a different perspective in doing things.

Curiosity opens up many more doors than you think.  It broadens your perspective and gives life a playful and refreshing slant.  A little knowledge is a dangerous thing, why not learn more?

Following the sweet successes of Tenacious tenacity!!! and Shan’s cockscrew of hope out of others, the sixth in a series of ten talks is entitled Shanshine’s M&Ms of playfulness! What is Shanshine’s M&Ms of playfulness? Two clues for you, ka-ching! and ka-bom! Living up to the chinese phonetics of Shan, which is san, meaning three in Chinese, three suggestions will also be offered to stoke the fires of your playfulness!

Let’s have fun!! I invite you to the sixth of my Positive Psychology series this evening in Singapore. Details as follows:

• Topic: Shanshine’s M&Ms of playfulness
• Venue: Bishan Toastmasters Club, Bishan Community Centre, Singapore
• Date: 29 April 2008
• Time: 7-10pm

I look forward to seeing you there!

With love,
Pei Shan

Guess what my score was?

3 out of 5!  I scored as high or higher than 8 in 10 test takers grouped under age, gender, education and occupation!

What is yours?

Here is a tabulation of strengths classified under each virtue, Wisdom and Knowledge, Courage, Humanity and Love, Justice, Temperance, and Transcendence (Seligman, 2002).

Wisdom and Knowledge

1. Curiosity/Interest in the World
2. Love of Learning
3. Judgment/Critical Thinking/Open-Mindedness
4. Ingenuity/Originality/Practical Intelligence/Street Smarts
5. Social Intelligence/Personal Intelligence/Emotional Intelligence
6. Perspective

Courage

1. Valour and Bravery
2. Perseverance/Industry/Diligence
3. Integrity/Genuineness/Honesty

Humanity and Love

1. Kindness and Generosity
2. Loving and Allowing Oneself to Be Loved

Justice

1. Citizenship/Duty/Teamwork/Loyalty
2. Fairness and Equity
3. Leadership

Temperance

1. Self-Control
2. Prudence/Discretion/Caution
3. Humility and Modesty

Transcendence

1. Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence
2. Gratitude
3. Hope/Optimism/Future-Mindedness
4. Spirituality/Sense of Purpose/Faith/Religiousness
5. Forgiveness and Mercy
6. Playfulness and Humour
7. Zest/Passion/Enthusiasm

My top five strengths are Creativity, ingenuity, and originality; Curiosity and interest in the world; Appreciation of beauty and excellence; Capacity to love and be loved; and Leadership. What is yours?

References

Seligman, M. E. P. (2002). Authentic happiness: Using the new Positive Psychology to realise your potential for lasting fulfillment. New York: Simon & Schuster.